Hitler's online poker account banned
German Kid poker
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
T20 prediction
Jason will attack Lords with a 10 foot long razor sharp cricket bat and cut off Ajantha Mendis' balls. Pakistan being used to such acts of terrorism will take fullest advantage of the pandemonium and lift the trophy.
It would be later revealed that it was Yuvraj Singh, tired of being out-foxed by Mendis, wearing a borrowed leather/skull-face mask and posing as Jason. Subsequently he would be awarded the Paramvir Chakra for supreme service and bravery on the cricket field. Mendis' balls will be on display at the Indian National Museum.
It would be later revealed that it was Yuvraj Singh, tired of being out-foxed by Mendis, wearing a borrowed leather/skull-face mask and posing as Jason. Subsequently he would be awarded the Paramvir Chakra for supreme service and bravery on the cricket field. Mendis' balls will be on display at the Indian National Museum.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Rinse and repeat offset by a tooth
Following up on last monday's win, I managed to win this same tournament again this monday, setting up nice back-to-back monday wins. But the run-good in poker has been offset by a massive toothache that decided to rear up its ugly head on Tuesday afternoon and doesnt show any signs of giving up, so much so that I got over my intense fear of dentists and actually set up an appointment for later today.
Needless to say I am super-scared, if there is one breed of doctors that flip the shit out of me its the dentists, I guess watching Marathon man too many times does that to you.
Needless to say I am super-scared, if there is one breed of doctors that flip the shit out of me its the dentists, I guess watching Marathon man too many times does that to you.
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
A live tourney win
I havent played live poker for a very very long time, so yesterday I decided to play in this smallish semi-decent tourney (structure-wise) that runs in houston every monday and thurday. Its a $60 buy-in, gets about 45-50 players and 1st is about 1.2-1.5kish.
Starting table description: huge donks all around who have no clue about tournament poker, insanely loose in the early stages literally playing any 2 cards and insanely tight in the later stages and closer to the final table/money, 1 semi-decent middle-age player.
Some hands:
1. my stack 6500, 50/100 blinds: I havent played a hand and open 3-6cc UTG to 300, old man next to me calls, one of the better players (BP1)(very tight though, about 10k stack) raises from the button to 1k, I call, old man folds. Flop 3 2 K (one club), I check call 800 bet (??), turn 6d, I check shove his bet and crack Aces, upto 11k. Start building up a loose crazy table image.
2. stack 10kish, 50/100, I call an insanely bald-bad-middle-eastern (BBME) player's utg limp with 55 from utg+2, 2 more callers, serial killer (SK) looking horrendously bad player makes it 350 (??) from the button, utg bad-player calls, i call, flop KK5 (nutzo baby), checks around, Turn 7, utg bets out 700, I flat, button hems and haws and hollywoods (we are'nt on TV you stupid fuck) and calls, river 7 (board 5KK77), fuck me.. utg leads 1400, i snap fold, terribad button hems and calls, utg shows A high, button shows QQ.. sigh donks, down to 7.8kish
3. stack 9kish, 100/200, BP1 ( semi-decent player from hand 1 limps), I complete SB with KcTc, BB checks.. flop Qc9c6c, i check, super-donk-middle-aged (SDM) BB leads 200, BP1 calls, I tiny raise to 900, SDM calls, BP1 calls... turn 5d, I lead 1350, SDM snap folds (???), semi decent player starts hemming and hawing, asks me if I have 2 pair and fnally calls, river 2d, I bet out 1350 (live players do not cll big river bets) and again BP1 hollywood calls, and mucks and says I had 2 pair on the flop (???? did he limp Q9/69/Q6 from MP, roll my eyes).. upto 15ksih
4. stack 13kish, blinds 100/200/25(antes), I open KhJh UTG to 575, donk middle aged next to me flats, donk in cap next to him flats, new semi competent young bluffy player (moved to our table, with 9k behind, played with him before) raises to 1700, I shove and get hollywood folds, upto 16k.
5. stack 16kish, blinds 200/400/50, I raise QcQs utg+2 to 1250, insanely tight middle aged donk in red cap snap shoves 5k, ultra short MP snap shoves 1.5k, I call and see Q7h and J8o and hold, upto 22kih.
No notable hands for some time after this, till with about 15 left the following hand occurs.
6. stack 28kish in the BB, 400/800/50, Semi decent player (BP1 from #1,#3, 23k behind, doesnt like to flip/race with decent stacks) opens utg+3 to 3700 (this means he either has JJ-, or AQ+), folds to me, i look down at TsTd, and shove, he gets all fidgety and looks in pain and finally calls with AKo, I win the flip and am chip leader with 40k+.
Final table. I am chip leader with a big stack 70k+, table has plenty of donkeys, bunch of short stacks (6 paid) and no decent players at all, but blinds are getting big
7. stack 70kish, 500/1000/100, I open 5c-8c UTG to 2200, another big stack terribad middle eastern young player (friend of bald dude from #2, 35kish behind) flats, flop 862r, I lead 2250, get called check down and win versus AK. (hmm didnt want to show my hand there).
Start opening liberally and get little resistance till players start pointing out "u opening lot of crap i think, u bully, one hand and you'll double us up" and some such shit, so tighten a little.
8. stack 80kish, 600/1200/100, I open 6c7c in UTG to 2900, good-natured-rich-terrible-at-poker lawyer shoves 11k from MP, I call and see him tabling 9dTd (????), flop 6d8dTc (flopped the joint), turn Qc, river Js, ok no biggie doubled up an ultra short stack thats all.
Hand dead till the following hand comes up,
9. 8 left,stack 55k, 600/1200/100, I have AsAc in MP,utg+2 (16k) opens to 5100 (??), bald-middle-eastern guy(30k) raises to 12000, I shove, utg+2 snap calls with AQ, bald guy hollywood folds and I hold.
Kind of easy sailing from there and go into heads-up with over 5:1 chip lead and win KQ vs AQ to take the tourney down. I might play this on thursday again, if I can haul my ass into the car for the 20 min ride. Easy money for the takings.
Starting table description: huge donks all around who have no clue about tournament poker, insanely loose in the early stages literally playing any 2 cards and insanely tight in the later stages and closer to the final table/money, 1 semi-decent middle-age player.
Some hands:
1. my stack 6500, 50/100 blinds: I havent played a hand and open 3-6cc UTG to 300, old man next to me calls, one of the better players (BP1)(very tight though, about 10k stack) raises from the button to 1k, I call, old man folds. Flop 3 2 K (one club), I check call 800 bet (??), turn 6d, I check shove his bet and crack Aces, upto 11k. Start building up a loose crazy table image.
2. stack 10kish, 50/100, I call an insanely bald-bad-middle-eastern (BBME) player's utg limp with 55 from utg+2, 2 more callers, serial killer (SK) looking horrendously bad player makes it 350 (??) from the button, utg bad-player calls, i call, flop KK5 (nutzo baby), checks around, Turn 7, utg bets out 700, I flat, button hems and haws and hollywoods (we are'nt on TV you stupid fuck) and calls, river 7 (board 5KK77), fuck me.. utg leads 1400, i snap fold, terribad button hems and calls, utg shows A high, button shows QQ.. sigh donks, down to 7.8kish
3. stack 9kish, 100/200, BP1 ( semi-decent player from hand 1 limps), I complete SB with KcTc, BB checks.. flop Qc9c6c, i check, super-donk-middle-aged (SDM) BB leads 200, BP1 calls, I tiny raise to 900, SDM calls, BP1 calls... turn 5d, I lead 1350, SDM snap folds (???), semi decent player starts hemming and hawing, asks me if I have 2 pair and fnally calls, river 2d, I bet out 1350 (live players do not cll big river bets) and again BP1 hollywood calls, and mucks and says I had 2 pair on the flop (???? did he limp Q9/69/Q6 from MP, roll my eyes).. upto 15ksih
4. stack 13kish, blinds 100/200/25(antes), I open KhJh UTG to 575, donk middle aged next to me flats, donk in cap next to him flats, new semi competent young bluffy player (moved to our table, with 9k behind, played with him before) raises to 1700, I shove and get hollywood folds, upto 16k.
5. stack 16kish, blinds 200/400/50, I raise QcQs utg+2 to 1250, insanely tight middle aged donk in red cap snap shoves 5k, ultra short MP snap shoves 1.5k, I call and see Q7h and J8o and hold, upto 22kih.
No notable hands for some time after this, till with about 15 left the following hand occurs.
6. stack 28kish in the BB, 400/800/50, Semi decent player (BP1 from #1,#3, 23k behind, doesnt like to flip/race with decent stacks) opens utg+3 to 3700 (this means he either has JJ-, or AQ+), folds to me, i look down at TsTd, and shove, he gets all fidgety and looks in pain and finally calls with AKo, I win the flip and am chip leader with 40k+.
Final table. I am chip leader with a big stack 70k+, table has plenty of donkeys, bunch of short stacks (6 paid) and no decent players at all, but blinds are getting big
7. stack 70kish, 500/1000/100, I open 5c-8c UTG to 2200, another big stack terribad middle eastern young player (friend of bald dude from #2, 35kish behind) flats, flop 862r, I lead 2250, get called check down and win versus AK. (hmm didnt want to show my hand there).
Start opening liberally and get little resistance till players start pointing out "u opening lot of crap i think, u bully, one hand and you'll double us up" and some such shit, so tighten a little.
8. stack 80kish, 600/1200/100, I open 6c7c in UTG to 2900, good-natured-rich-terrible-at-poker lawyer shoves 11k from MP, I call and see him tabling 9dTd (????), flop 6d8dTc (flopped the joint), turn Qc, river Js, ok no biggie doubled up an ultra short stack thats all.
Hand dead till the following hand comes up,
9. 8 left,stack 55k, 600/1200/100, I have AsAc in MP,utg+2 (16k) opens to 5100 (??), bald-middle-eastern guy(30k) raises to 12000, I shove, utg+2 snap calls with AQ, bald guy hollywood folds and I hold.
Kind of easy sailing from there and go into heads-up with over 5:1 chip lead and win KQ vs AQ to take the tourney down. I might play this on thursday again, if I can haul my ass into the car for the 20 min ride. Easy money for the takings.
Sunday, June 07, 2009
Beer , porn and an anal violation of Uncle Ben
This one came out in february, and is perhaps one of the first instance of a top brand alligning itself with porno
Uncle Ben gets grilled big time
Uncle Ben gets grilled big time
Friday, June 05, 2009
MS girl
While on our beach vacation, me and mrs.sen were fooling around with the camera and ended up shooting a mini photo session on the beach (me behind the lens as the expert photographer !!). My wife gets most of her suits from here and the company seems to be running a fun competition of sort for their customers.
So on a whim she sent in some of our vacation "photo-session" snaps and lo and behold we got an email today saying she won the june competition and she will be on the june edition of the 2009 malibu strings calender (comes with a 500 dollar gift voucher) as well as a request to be part of the malibu-string-girls-gang (invitation to the annual malibu string party at Vegas, all expenses covered)
Running good in life at the moment it seems.
So on a whim she sent in some of our vacation "photo-session" snaps and lo and behold we got an email today saying she won the june competition and she will be on the june edition of the 2009 malibu strings calender (comes with a 500 dollar gift voucher) as well as a request to be part of the malibu-string-girls-gang (invitation to the annual malibu string party at Vegas, all expenses covered)
Running good in life at the moment it seems.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
ship it
The 2009 World series of poker (WSOP) is underway and I finally managed to satellite into the main event on my 4th try via a $650 satellite on Cake. 3 seats were guaranteed (12k packages for the winners), I pretty much got into cruise control from 30 left and went into the final table 2nd in chips. Was a pretty easy run in the home stretch, something that has not happened lately in tournaments for me.
Anyway the package includes : the 10k tournament buy-in plus 2k in expenses for the main event or the 10k buyin plus 1k travel expenses plus 5 day stay at the Rio,Vegas.
Heres how the main event schedule looks this year:
All I need to do now is squeeze in a vacation from work, my wife will make the trip with me, her first poker trip, unless she has some really pressing issues at schools (her phd qualifiers are right after the summer). For the time being I redeemed the package from Cake-poker as there are a ton of stuff that needs to go right at work for my vacation to come through, allowing me to play. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed.
Anyway the package includes : the 10k tournament buy-in plus 2k in expenses for the main event or the 10k buyin plus 1k travel expenses plus 5 day stay at the Rio,Vegas.
Heres how the main event schedule looks this year:
| Fri, Jul 3rd 12:00 PM 13-Day Event |  | World Championship No-Limit Texas Hold'em (Event 57) No Rebuy/Add-ons
| | $10,000 | | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
All I need to do now is squeeze in a vacation from work, my wife will make the trip with me, her first poker trip, unless she has some really pressing issues at schools (her phd qualifiers are right after the summer). For the time being I redeemed the package from Cake-poker as there are a ton of stuff that needs to go right at work for my vacation to come through, allowing me to play. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
big day tomorrow
Lately I have been playing cash games mostly online with the occassional shot at a tournament without much success. I can go on and on about the sick beats, coolers that I've had in tourneys recently, but then again I am not playing those too well either.
Usually when I am playing a couple of tournaments, I'd open up some Heads-up cash games and end up focusing on those.
Anyway tomorrow is a potential big day, am playing 4 biggies tomorrow. Heres the schedule:
I need to try and keep my focus as lately in tourneys I am losing my focus pretty quickly. Also RUN GOOD ONE TIME. Godspeed
Usually when I am playing a couple of tournaments, I'd open up some Heads-up cash games and end up focusing on those.
Anyway tomorrow is a potential big day, am playing 4 biggies tomorrow. Heres the schedule:
- $13 100k guarantee MiniFTOPS event 22 1:05PM
- $126 1 million guarantee FTOPS event 22 1:00PM
- $55 500k guarantee MiniFTOPS main event 6:05 PM
- $550 5 million guarantee FTOPS main event 6:00 PM
I need to try and keep my focus as lately in tourneys I am losing my focus pretty quickly. Also RUN GOOD ONE TIME. Godspeed
Friday, May 15, 2009
Eech beach pear plumb in comes tom thumb
On the memorial day weekend and no its not gonna be a choc-a-bloc teeming-with-millions beach. As per the brochure, if we are willing to drive a tad we can potentially have 50 miles of pristine beach all to ourselves.
WOOOOT.
WOOOOT.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Thursday, April 09, 2009
On the Balla wishlist
I've been eyeing this piece for sometime now (well over 2 weeks to be precise), I saw it on a close buddy of mine who took down a 35k first place finish at the Bay shooting Star casino,CA, poker tourney last month (one I almost played, but bailed out at the last moment due to work commitments). Of course he's got an even balla time-piece, but this Breitling Super Avenger would do nicely for me. First I need a poker score this month, I have been running like a one-legged kenyan all of March, and on a mini 5k downswing.
In the meantime here some more balla time pieces for your viewing pleasure (snaps by Nat taken at the Bellagio 25k World poker tour main event, Las Vegas, last year, one on the extreme right belongs to online poker phenom Sorel "Imperium" Mizzi and is in the 75k range):
In the meantime I went ahead and bought a bunch of gold this week, primarily as a hedge, and also because the market is so damn expensive.
Suggested weekend readings:Zerohedge
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Irksome
1. People talking out of their arse at dinner parties.
2. Oh so you want to play poker for a living, wow thats kind of degen(erate) isnt it?
3. Gambling as a career, thats a first right?
4. How can slumdogg millionaire win even one oscar, its a pure desi masala movie yaar (usually from a dreaded desi chic who cant pronounce trainspotting).
5. You know, smoking kills.
6. I saw Pink Floyd in concert, did you know they are the greatest band of all time (sigh donk)
At this point, I think of Happy Gilmore, and try and conjure up images of a happy place, think of a happy place, do not, repeat DO NOT get sarcastic and start correcting them. But .... sigh
2. Oh so you want to play poker for a living, wow thats kind of degen(erate) isnt it?
3. Gambling as a career, thats a first right?
4. How can slumdogg millionaire win even one oscar, its a pure desi masala movie yaar (usually from a dreaded desi chic who cant pronounce trainspotting).
5. You know, smoking kills.
6. I saw Pink Floyd in concert, did you know they are the greatest band of all time (sigh donk)
At this point, I think of Happy Gilmore, and try and conjure up images of a happy place, think of a happy place, do not, repeat DO NOT get sarcastic and start correcting them. But .... sigh
Saturday, April 04, 2009
unzip my pants say you love me
At the recent Lakme fashion week, Akshay Kumar went, ummm lets see whats the right word, strip-teasey (?), and thus invoked the wrath of the indian moral brigade.
While walking the ramp he decided to stroll over to his wife and asked a bemused Twinkle Khanna to unbutton/unzip his jeans for her. Though there is something of a coochy-poochy lovey-dovey feel about asking your wife to publicly unzip your pants, whatever brownie points he managed to score in my books are lost due to those HORRENDOUS boots he's put on.
Whoever made Akshay wear those boots, please drink bleach and run into a brick wall ASAP.
While walking the ramp he decided to stroll over to his wife and asked a bemused Twinkle Khanna to unbutton/unzip his jeans for her. Though there is something of a coochy-poochy lovey-dovey feel about asking your wife to publicly unzip your pants, whatever brownie points he managed to score in my books are lost due to those HORRENDOUS boots he's put on.
Whoever made Akshay wear those boots, please drink bleach and run into a brick wall ASAP.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Oldies
I was sifting through my music and came across these old favorites, ended up youtubing them. Reminded me of a time etched in memory.
Audioslave
We passed upon the stairs, Cobain at mtv unplugged
Jakob Dylan
BOC live, plenty of live improvisation on the signature reaper riff, around 2:45
s&m one, Hetfield at his snarling best, and notice how the band lines up for the signature one grunge (around 5:07)
november rain
bang bang
but if you could heal a broken heart
wouldnt time be out to charm you
Audioslave
We passed upon the stairs, Cobain at mtv unplugged
Jakob Dylan
BOC live, plenty of live improvisation on the signature reaper riff, around 2:45
s&m one, Hetfield at his snarling best, and notice how the band lines up for the signature one grunge (around 5:07)
november rain
bang bang
but if you could heal a broken heart
wouldnt time be out to charm you
Monday, March 23, 2009
Meet the Dumbest people in your corporation
The HR guys, they are driving me nuts. And they love meetings, they schedule milestone meetings, trademark meetings, celebratory meetings, meetings to discuss meetings, redundant strat meetings, and this when research is working on air-tight deadline mode, oh and we had a meeting to discuss our upcoming journal publications as well !!! ... dumb fuckheads.
A certain Professor at Stanford said it best "Let Engineers and Scientists run the country instead of Lawyers, MBAs and Economists." (v 2.1)
HR folks: please get aids and die ASAP
A certain Professor at Stanford said it best "Let Engineers and Scientists run the country instead of Lawyers, MBAs and Economists." (v 2.1)
HR folks: please get aids and die ASAP
Monday, March 09, 2009
Playing the Coushatta 1k
I dont usually like playing in small-buyin casino tournaments (primarily because of the mind-boggling testicularly retarded slowness of live poker vs online poker), but a friend convinced me to take this trip with him, later this month, to Louisiana for the Coushatta Casino 1k buy-in main event. Hopefully the event attracts atleast 300 players (so that 1st is atleast 50k to make the trip and staying in hotels for 4 days worthwhile, FYI: I hate travelling), but given the current economy that might be a stretch.
Anyway 300 is the magic number, if they get less than 300 players I'm out, not worth my time by any stretch.
Anyhoo today was bloody sunday of online poker, and somehow I convinced myself to play some sunday special donkament tourneys : Results : 0/11. LOL Donkaments.
Anyway 300 is the magic number, if they get less than 300 players I'm out, not worth my time by any stretch.
Anyhoo today was bloody sunday of online poker, and somehow I convinced myself to play some sunday special donkament tourneys : Results : 0/11. LOL Donkaments.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Crickets with balls
They justify my love for everything with balls. Long live sehwagology, may natalie portman parade more in Closer style Gs.
Friday, February 13, 2009
starbucks loves israel
Today I went to my regular grocery store carrying my starbucks frapp , the store is owned and operated by a middle-aged, supremely chatty, affable, middle eastern bald dude. Now I have always suspected that he thinks that I am a muslim. Anyway as soon as I get in he greets me "You know you should never buy anything from starbucks", Why, "Anything you buy at starbucks a % of the money is sent to israel to kill muslim children". You sure about that, "Oh yes ask Jamil (his brother/something like that) here". Jamil :" Fucking child murderers, killing allah's sons."
Hmmmm.
As an aside I recently added up my one month starbucks expense : $356.44. The wise might say I am an SBUX addict.
Hmmmm.
As an aside I recently added up my one month starbucks expense : $356.44. The wise might say I am an SBUX addict.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
swingy
Dropped 6 buy-ins in HU (heads-up) NL last night. Though it sounds disappointing I think my play was fine, got rivered a lot and lost 4 straight flips (1.5 buyin donations to these flips).
Time for the upswing now !!
edit (02/07): made back 5 buy-ins after putting in a marathon all night session. Run good more please
Time for the upswing now !!
edit (02/07): made back 5 buy-ins after putting in a marathon all night session. Run good more please
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